Blocked

<img src='blocked_writer.jpg'> Why can't I (link-reveal:"*write*")+(t8n:"dissolve")[ (well, obviously //I can write//, you can see that here)]? More specifically, why can't I write on the big project that [[I really want to work on]]? Maybe it's just that I really want it to be good, and I can't bear the idea of making a bad version of the ideal thing that sits in my head. Or maybe it's that I've "used up" all of my creativity on work, and have nothing left in the creative "gas tank". (if: $inventory does not contain "no tea")[ Or maybe it's just that I have (transition-depart:"blur")[[no tea]].]

## What I really want to work on (text-style:"condense")["I don't want to write, I want to //have written//" --Douglas Adams, probably ] It's an epic Sci-Fi story, about what it means to be human. It's a philosophical and also deeply personal story. So, I'm emotionally invested, and I want to get it right. There's a lot there, and it clearly won't fit into a short story, but how do I even approach that? Should I make an [[outline]], should I pre-write some about what the story is supposed to be about? I never do this stuff, and I haven't ever really needed to. I have some *notes*, but that's not really the same thing. I haven't written anything substantial (link:"*for ages*")[at least since the pandemic], with one significant difference. I wrote a lot for the [[D&D Campaign]] that I ran.

## The Mystery of Friendship Glade Somehow, this doesn't feel quite like long-form writing, even though there's a lot of words going onto the page(s). Some of that is probably the episodic nature of the meduium, but //aren't book chapters essentially episodes//? I think it also turns out that starting with a map is an important difference. Painting the map gives you a kind of an [[outline]] for the story - the characters start here, they go there, they investigate the other.(if: $inventory does not contain "tea")[ And sometimes, they pick up some [[tea]].]

## Outlines I use outlines extensively in my technical writing and blog posts, but I haven't applied them to creative writing since I was [[in school]]. Maybe it's time to actually revisit that? Part of the reason I wanted to explore [[this format]] is that it is a little like an outline, or a mind map. I can think about just a bit at a time (enforced by the single passage at a time view). Hopefully this means I can make some progress on my [[Big Story|I really want to work on]]

## Past trauma stalks the writing room I really didn't have a great experience with wrinting in Junior High and High School. Bad teachers made me think I was not a good writer. I got some very [[good feedback]] from a professor in college, but I really didn't believe it or take it to heart. I really loved writing for [[D&D campaigns|D&D Campaign]], though. I wonder what was different about that, as opposed to creative writing exercises & essay assignments.

## Listen to Feedback, Mark! People *love* my writing. They tell me so, which is nice, but also feeds the [[imposter syndrome]], ironically enough. I've had great responses to my one published story, to my Personal Stories performances, to my blog posts. (link-repeat:"//I am a good writer, //")[//I am a good writer, //]and I need to keep telling myself that.

## Who do you think you are? Hanging out with a bunch of writers on a cruise is fun, but also makes me feel the despair over my lack of output all the more keenly. But I'm definitely making quick progress on this little project, which is pretty great. Even if it is (literally) writing (transition-depart:"blur")[[in circles|Blocked]]

## Twine as a brainstorming tool There's a bit of rat-hole potential on the story / code format side, but ultimately, I think having the simple Markdown format *text formatting* is pretty useful in keeping me from obsessing over making things look just so. It's nice to have the ability to link back to [[earlier points|outline]] in the narrative easily. I sometimes force myself to write with a [[pen]] and [[notebook]], in a similar way to try to activate different parts of my brain.

(set: $inventory to (ds:)) (set: $room_inventory to (dm:"Blocked", (a: "no tea")))

# Blocked -----

------ (if: $inventory is not (ds:))[You have: $inventory]

(set: $inventory to (ds:"tea", "pen", "notebook", "thermonuclear bomb")) (if: $inventory is not empty)[you have: $inventory] (if: $inventory contains "pen" and it contains "notebook" and it contains "tea")[got it] (put: "Mark" into $name) $name

## Tea "You want the flavor of dried leaves, boiled in water?" --Douglas Adams [[Yes|pick up tea]] [[No, thank you|D&D Campaign]]

(set: $inventory to it + (ds:"tea")) (set: $inventory to it - (ds:"no tea")) (if: $inventory contains "pen" and it contains "notebook" and it contains "tea") [ (goto: "go write") ] else [ (goto: "D&D Campaign") ]

(set: $inventory to it - (ds:"tea")) (set: $inventory to it + (ds:"no tea")) (goto: "Blocked")

## Pens I really like my Micron felt-tip pens. There's one right here. [[Pick up the pen]]

(set: $inventory to it + (ds:"pen")) (if: $inventory contains "pen" and it contains "notebook" and it contains "tea") [ (goto: "go write") ] else [ (goto: "this format") ]

## Notebook With gridded paper, naturally. And preferably a brightly-colored cover. [[Pick up the notebook]]

(set: $inventory to it + (ds:"notebook")) (if: $inventory contains "pen" and it contains "notebook" and it contains "tea") [ (goto: "go write") ] else [ (goto: "this format") ]

#You've Got This! You have the tools. You're out of excuses. Now, go write. ## The End Thanks for playing.